Sorry, Not Sorry

Knowing when to say you’re sorry can be one of the hardest things to do. Not only could you be mad at the person you have to say it to, but you also have to be the one to swallow your pride and admit when you’re wrong.

But what happens when you say you’re sorry to someone and you shouldn’t have said it, but they should have?

Earlier in the week, a friend and I went to go see UW-Madison’s production of Legally Blonde: The Musical (which was really good btw because who doesn’t love a good bend ‘n snap?!)

Anyway, we were seated on the aisle and thought it was good because it had looked like all the middle of our row was already filled up, so I was feeling like we could probably just sit in peace until the show started.

I realized I spoke too soon because then three people from the very middle realized that they were in somebody else’s seats and, as it turns out, they just picked these random seats to sit in, hoping that no one would come to claim them.

1. That is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. I understand that this is college and you feel like since you paid your thousands in tuition, you feel like you’re entitled to just about anything on campus, but believe it or not, you are wrong. So wrong. Assigned seats, people! They didn’t put that seat number on your ticket for the good of their health!

2. Now that you’ve decided you really don’t get to sit anywhere you damn well please, you have to make the rest of us stand up, push ourselves back into our chairs as far as we can, only to step on our feet anyway.

And after you stepped on my foot, I was the one to go, “Oops!! Sorry!”

ME! I’m the one who said sorry for that person to step on my foot!

grumpy cat

Seriously, though. #sorrynotsorry

I told my friend this and we kinda laughed about it, because we both realized that we say ‘sorry’ for things that are totally not our faults. Now, that’s messed up.

So, I’m here today to tell you to stop saying sorry and save it for the times you actually need to be sorry. Like when you accidentally leave the door open talking to your friend and their cat runs out, never to be seen again, or when you forget to water their plants when they’re out of town, or when you may or may not have lost their favorite tube of lipstick. Those are perfect times to bring out the ol’ “I’m sorry!”

Times when you shouldn’t say sorry are when:

  • you get off the elevator and almost run into the person trying to get on, even though you know that they should’ve waited in the first place. Elevator etiquette, people!
  • two people are talking in the middle of the hallway, but refuse to move when you come walking by so you have to split in between them. Because saying, “excuse me” could come off bitchy, you feel like you have to throw a ‘sorry’ in there somewhere to save face.
  • you tell someone that you don’t want a boyfriend/husband/kids/pet/etc. and feel like you have to explain yourself. Just go on being your hot self and let them worry about their make-believe timelines; you’ll get to all of them when you’re ready.
  • you didn’t put on eye makeup this morning and everyone is walking around asking you if you’re sick. I HATE this. I have big eyes and puffy looking eyelids if I don’t put makeup on. My lack of eyeliner does not mean I have the plague!!
  • you’re reminding someone to do something that they should have done yesterday. You shouldn’t feel sorry for them not sticking to the deadline.
  • you’re asking for help. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve said, “Sorry, but can you help me with this? I’m not getting it.” to my boss or coworker. But I now realize that it’s not my fault for not getting it all the time, because I’m sure they don’t either.
  • you want alone time. Everyone needs their space to just be them, so don’t apologize for not making plans every night because you deserve some alone time to make sure you’re taking care of you.

I feel like I’ve left so many other ‘sorry’ situations off the list, but feel free to let me know when you’ve said, “sorry” and then immediately regretted it.

Don’t feel like you have to constantly apologize for yourself because chances are, you shouldn’t be. Start apologizing for the bigger things and start learning when you should be saying, “sorry, not sorry.” 🙂

Until next time,

C. Brooks

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