Things You Could Do Instead

There’s like a flip that’s switched after a first date, I swear.

You go into the date like, “I just hope this isn’t painful.” And after you leave him, and you actually have fun, you decide you like him.

But only, like, a little bit. Nothing crazy.

Still, you wonder when he’ll text you to plan the next time you’ll meet up.

You totally weren’t invested in this shit that much before the date. But after, you’re just too excited about the boy, so you put your phone on loud and will him to send you something.

Anything.

It could be the freaking Bat Signal for all you care.

Still nothing? Crap.

I’ve fallen into this trap many a times before, so I’ve devised a list of things you can do instead of waiting and willing for him to give you the green light.

1. Clean your apartment.

2. Organize your sock drawer.

3. Figure out how Kim Kardashian does her favorite selfie pout.

4. Proceed to take 40 selfies to find one good one to post.

5. Go through your old high school photos on Facebook and delete all of the embarrassing photos that were once seen as ‘cute’ and ‘freaking hilarious’ because I can assure you they are no longer ‘cute’ or ‘freaking hilarious.’

4. Find some string and make a friendship bracelet for your BFF. Hey, girl, hey!

5. Learn how to sew on a button. Because that shit is useful, that’s why.

6. Take your dog for a walk. No dog? Imagine you have one and go for a walk.

7. Call your mom. Lord knows she’s got something she’s been meaning to tell you.

8. Organize your pantryย withoutย eating anything from it in the process. #selfcontrol #HBIC

9. Take out your computer to work remotely.

10. Put the computer back into your bag; you know you aren’t going to do any work at a time like this.

11. Go through your iPhone and delete your unused apps. Why keep the Drink Counter? You’re out of college, sober up enough to count your own damn drinks.

12. Cut all your split ends –and don’t pretend like you don’t have ’em. Literally everyone does. Ugh.

13. Remember all the starving people in the world. Buck up, kiddo, people have worse situations than you.

14. Watch a couple episodes of Friends to do away with the guilt trip I’ve just put you on.

15. Remind yourself that it’s only been one date. Cool it, lady. You got this. Go live your fabulous life and when you come back, there will probably be a carrier pigeon waiting for you with his plans to meet up.

Hey, it could happen. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Until next time,

C. Brooks

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